So it has been a little over 2 months since James passed away and life around me seems to be going along the same. Its strange how life can change so quickly. Just over two months ago we were excitedly awaiting the arrival of our second son. Now we are learning live with the fact that he is not here with us. It is strange going to the store even sometimes and just watching people going on with their lives and you are just thinking to yourself that they have no idea what has happened and it seems strange to be around "normal" life. My life is no longer the same and I am just learning to adapt to the new life that Mel, William and I have. There is a feeling of something missing no matter what you do. Days go on and we keep to a normal schedule for William and go to work and school each day and no one around us realizes that our life is not the same as it used to be. I know that I am and I'm sure that Mel is good at acting like everything is just fine when around other people but at the same time the mind is just wandering and not focusing on anything it needs to. I sit through class and just think about James and what I should be doing now. I should just be returning to work and not be taking class until July. But instead I have been back to work for two months and am taking class now. I know to anyone who is reading this my thoughts don't seem to flow together very well but that's just how they came out of my head tonight. Sorry if it confused you but I'm just writing my thoughts.
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